Category Archives: Miscarriage

Miscarriage fears, faith, and a great God

Warning: girl problems and body parts discussed read at your own risk. At 12 weeks in my third pregnancy I had a miscarriage. Today I’m 12 weeks 4 days and I’ve had some miscarriage symptoms along with some odd bladder issues. A little spotting, some cramping, and difficulty urinating over the last two days. I …

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I can feel it!

Last week I felt some little flips always in the same spot of my lower belly. I thought it must be the baby. At only 11 weeks, it’s a little early to feel the baby’s movement but not unheard of. This weekend we were at family camp (a T1D camp we attend every October) and …

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When faith wins

When I found out I was pregnant again after 2 miscarriages, I was afraid. I was worried I would be afraid the whole pregnancy, but I gave my fear to God and asked him to full me with his faith. And it worked! Every time I feel worried or scared, I just ask God to …

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Fear vs. Faith

I’m not even sure how to put this into words. I just found out I’m pregnant, as in just took a test and looked at my calendar and am only 5-6 weeks along. Way too early to start telling everyone, but after two miscarriages I find that I have some extreme emotions about this pregnancy. …

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This was supposed to be the month…

I should be huge, uncomfortable, irritated by the weather, using 5 pillows to sleep at night, but super excited and ready to hold my baby. My little boy who was born in March and never took a breath. It should’ve been this month, his due date was this month. It’s crazy how often this thought …

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Who knew

Who would have ever thought Mother’s Day could be so emotional? I can remember before we had TJ feeling a little sad on Mother’s Day because we had been trying for 2 years and hadn’t become parents yet. I’ve been celebrating this holiday for 10 years as a mom, and don’t remember crying on it …

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Trying to stay alive and healthy

Normally when I’m blogging about keeping someone alive it’s about TJ and high or low blood sugars but this time, its about me. Something that started causing me worry while I was pregnant was suddenly Having high blood pressure. Every time I went to the urgent care for my sinus infection, the Dr mentioned that …

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Funeral planning and more drama

Yesterday was such a crazy and emotional day. We started out meeting with the funeral home and then the cemetery to arrange for Peters burial and headstone. We planned his funeral for Wednesday afternoon, that was emotional enough for one day. After we were done we stopped by my parents house to pick up G …

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When empathy doesn’t help

Tony and I just spent two nights in the hospital birth center to a deliver a baby that would never grow up or be held. Every nurse, doctor, midwife, social worker, and chaplain tried so hard to be empathetic, caring, and supportive but it just made it more emotional for us. I don’t mean that …

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Compartmentalizing

I was at a regular checkup, expecting to find out what the midwife thought about my high blood pressure, hear my baby’s heartbeat, and then go visit my parents. But it wasn’t a regular checkup. We talked about my blood pressure, and some tests she wanted me to do. Then she used her little machine …

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